Believe In His Name Through God

But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name (John 1:12).

Even as times get more difficult during the first Christmas holiday that I am with Tony, I find that the Lord is with me. The more desperate I become, the more I need to listen to His word and His messages to me. There are times that I just want to give up especially as I watch others go about the holiday season as if nothing has changed.

MY WHOLE WORLD HAS CHANGED! Yet no one seems as distraught as me or feels that this is all wrong without Tony here with me. Only I feel these feelings. And I need the Lord to help me listen to His word and to believe in his name.

It is said that the change is gradually in us. Even though it is gradual, that does not mean that it isn’t powerful. I experienced a drastic change that day that my dad prayed with me in his driveway. But since then, when I am listening as I should, I notice all sorts of changes in my life. They are gradual changes and some that are still playing out.

….it is high time to awake out of sleep: for now is our salvation nearer than when we believed (Roman 13:11 KJV).

God enables us to make the radical changes necessary for spiritual growth. If we are consumed by our grief, then it will be harder for us to listen and find our God given destiny. I don’t know what my God given destiny is but I try very hard to watch for signs from the Lord so as to direct me down the right path.

We are all sinners and it is not an secret why we suffer during loss. I know that I am being selfish when I think that it isn’t fair that Tony is not here with me. I want him to come back and everything to be back to normal. That is just not going to happen and I need to accept this. It is not to say that I need to understand this because, quite frankly, I do not understand why this is how my life is playing out.

But what I do know it that I have a purpose on this planet whether Tony is here or not. This is a hard concept to grasp when since losing Tony. I thought whatever my purpose is, it involved Tony being a part of it. At times I don’t understand how I am supposed to be able to listen to what my destiny is because I am so consumed with grief.

Like the caterpillar that eats and sleeps its way into change, the process occurs gradually but nonetheless powerfully. T.D. Jakes

God has made changes in my life but I can’t say that they have been gradual. Instead they have been happened quite quickly. In an instant my life was changed overnight. How can I listen as I should when the change has taken my breath away? Well, this is when I need help from the Lord and others on the same or similar paths.

My God-given destiny awaits me and you too BUT we have to pay attention and listen. There are times that I feel the Lord giving me signs of what I am supposed to be doing but it is only through prayer and being completely in the Lord’s presence that I will be able to determine what my destiny holds for me. Are you listening for your God-given destiny? Do you have a hard time believing that you have one since losing a loved one? I can say I do at times. That is why it is so important to make time for the Lord each and every day, no matter how busy you may be.

Just listen!

Regards,

~ Holley